Tuesday, November 24, 2009


Do I dare? Do I dare spook it?

I don't know, I think I'm gonna have to...

For the first time in the year and a half since we lost our home and began this nightmare--I feel...wait for it, now, here it comes--HOPEFUL.

After a very kind phone call from our attorney, I feel uplifted. We are meeting with him on Monday, Dec. 1st at 9:00 a.m. (EDIT: I meant Tuesday, Dec 1st--not Monday) He is ready to knock this out! He needs the fax number for the payroll dept. at Ed's work so as we can immediately get the $1000.00 a month garnishment stopped.

Ed gets paid on Thursday, Dec. 3rd--we're hoping it won't be too late to stop it on that paycheck, but...if not, the next pay check (on the 17th) will be $500.00 less anemic. That means we can actually buy a Christmas a tree and a few gifts....

Not only that, but he offered to reimburse us the $45.00 we paid for our mandatory on-line credit counseling as a show of good faith. $45.00 is GOLD to me--I'm elated.

I've had this perpetual gnawing in my stomach for well over a year now--a dull ache. And then, just yesterday, a knot formed in the base of my lower back. You can actually feel it there--like a softball just settling against a fence, with no breeze or movement to get it to shove along...

Ed and 'J' (our 'oldest son') both tried to work it out but, it remained unmoved.

I've lost weight, gained weight, over slept and not slept enough.

We haven't eaten out, we haven't gone to movies (unless it was courtesy of a gift card through a vendor--which has been months now) and we certainly haven't traveled.

We haven't been living and have confined ourselves to our own little corner of the universe. Well, truth be told--more myself than Ed: ignoring phone calls, not making any and having people come to me instead of me venturing out into what I have come to perceive as the 'big, bad world' and all who inhabit it.

My dirty little secret? I'm borderlining 'agoraphobia', mostly keeping company with my prized Pez dispenser collection.

Pretty 'effing' pathetic.

I've cried more times than I can count and had given up hope of ever having a life resembling normal again.

Could it be that hope is resurfacing?

I feel like crying again--only this time, they're happy tears--and I'm holding out hope for hope.

I may even have to change the title of my blog--whoda thunk it?

Should that be the case--if, in fact, I'm not hoping too much here--any suggestions?


  1. Diary of a "Revived" Housewife!

    New beginnings are on the horizon. I am praying for you and for your family. I know you have experienced a nightmare year or more.
    Keep hanging in there!
    Blessings, hugs, and prayers, andrea

  2. Awww, thank you, Andrea--I appreciate so much your prayers and well wishes.

    Your support--and that of everyone--has given me reasons to smile again.

    Much thanks!
    Peace, love and happiness,

  3. P.S. I love the possible new blog title, Andrea--good one! :)

  4. This is wonderful news! I always read your blog, I just can't comment from work cause of the stupid blockers. Anywho . . . I would love to send you a Christmas card if that's ok with you! Hope to hear from you soon! You know how to get a hold of me. :)

  5. Hope is wonderful, isn't it? Embrace it - dance with it - make out with it in the backseat if you feel like it. :-)

    Glad things are looking up!

  6. Making out in the backseat--ahhhh, the nostalgia. Memories of high school--or, um...yesterday. Whatever.

    Don't judge me.

    Meeko--I would LOVE a Christmas card, especially from you! :) Somehow I think the 'ol kittens in a basket thing isn't your style--thank goodness.

    Not that there's anything wrong with that--ha!

    Kindly E-mail me @ ejcbtheshamrock4@aol.com and I'll send ya back my address.


  7. I feel for you, hang in there. There is light at the end of the tunnel.
    My hubby lost his "secure" job our only income 13 months ago and last week he started his new job. I have two little ones 7 and 12 and the older one is Type 1 diabetic so I know thing or two about tough times. Within a year we had to stop traveling, shopping, eating out and had to borrow money from our parents to be able feed our kids, buy insulin and pay the mortgage.

    It will get better. You need to think positive and hope for the best. It will happen. We are getting our first real paycheck December 10th and I can't wait.Unfortunately the paycheck comes with my hubby being away from us 2 weeks at the time, but at this point I'll take anything.


  8. Things are indeed looking up, Ms. Bibi--for myself and my little family as well as for you and yours.

    Hope is, sometimes, all we have--so, as long as I've got it NOW, I'm not letting go....

    Hang in there, Mamma!

    Audra--I thought about that title, too...not sure, though. I was thinking (never a good thing--ha!) perhaps of something along the lines of: 'Diary Of A ONCE Sad Housewife' or 'Diary Of A No Longer Sad Housewife'--something like that.

    But then....I'd have to have a new blog button made--which means I would be, once again, at the mercy of someone more clever and computer savvy that I. ;)

    We'll see how this all pans out....

    Much thanks.

  9. Jo, it looks like there is a Santa Claus. Finally a break! Couldn't have happened at a better time. Still sending good thoughts your way. Have a terrific holiday!

  10. Awww, thank you, Kyle--so very much appreciated.

    Hope my compassionate fellow vegetarian enjoys his turkey free 'Thanksgiving'!

    Sending good thoughts right back at ya! ;)

  11. Jo, I am so HAPPY for you! That is great news! There is a light at the end of a very long tunnel.

    Now we can do the happy dance!!! woo hoo!!


  12. Thank you, kind Allen! Your happiness for others is contagious and I so appreciate your spirit and kindness.